Just Drop It

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Just Drop It

I have a confession. When I am in a conflict with another, I have trouble letting it go.  Though I should just drop it, I often just cannot seem to let things go.  I have trouble dropping the matter.   You may identify and share in this common struggle.  I wrote this post about 7 months ago.  The struggle is still real today.

The Bible lays out a sobering progression, going from bad to worse.

1. Contention...

Contention defined as a struggling together in opposition; a striving in rivalry. This can be relatively benign and harmless. We can agree to disagree. However, Proverbs 26:20 says, "For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, contention quiets down." Just drop it already. Give it a rest. Stop talking about it and calmer heads just may prevail.

2. Strife...

Strife is defined as vigorous or bitter conflict, discord, or antagonism. Matters have now escalated. Bitterness can set in and antagonism never helps. "The beginning of strife is like letting out water, So abandon the quarrel before it breaks out." (Proverbs 17:14).

3. Quarrels...

When the situation is not arrested, it can lead to quarreling. A quarrel is defined as an angry dispute or altercation; a disagreement marked by a temporary or permanent break in friendly relations. Proverbs 20:3 says, "Keeping away from strife is an honor for a man, But any fool will quarrel." To arrest the situation now and do not allow it to progress is an act of wisdom.

4. Blowing Up...

Quarreling is dangerous. Matters can get out of hand quickly. Without temperance and wisdom, we can fly off the handle and say very damaging things in a moment of anger and rage. Proverbs 29:11 says, "A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back." Giving full vent to your anger, opening up the carburetor and letting loose is not good. Healing from heated moments are is hard.

5. Gossip...

Talking has now turned into anger.  More has been said than should have been said. Lines of communication are completely disrupted. Talking with this person may cease, but talking to maliciously others about this situation begins. The Bible calls this gossip. Gossip is defined as idle talk or rumor, especially about the personal or private affairs of others. Proverbs 18:8 says, "The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; they go down into the inner parts of the body." You are now maligning the reputation of another and leading others to think less of a person. It is one sided and gossip is sin.

6. Conspire...

At this point, the relationship is utterly fractured, but it can go darker. You now begin to secretly conspire. You start laying traps for revenge. Proverbs 26:27 says, "Whoever digs a pit will fall into it, and a stone will come back on him who starts it rolling." Do you see where this has gone? We started with contention and a struggling in opposition, but now you are actively working toward the demise of another in secret.

A Broker of Peace

One of my favorite Donald Miller quotes says,  "Any fool can create conflict. It takes an emotional genius to broker peace."  May it be so.
By |January 12th, 2017|Categories: Blog List, General|0 Comments